Blog: Life of Sophie

In a queue, shelves empty everywhere, the man in front of me asks,
"Did you get the toilet paper", me "no I've buying some gin".

Man: "I've got some toilet paper in my car if you want to go for a drink".

 

Have a drink with me and I'll give you some toilet paper.

 

I just dont get this hoarding and prepping mentality out there. Christ i have a flock of jackdaws right outside my window i want a rifle right about now. Shut up!

 

Ok, some news, I've been told I'm off work until the end of the month, it will be reviewed then.
The situation is so many events have been cancelled, there's really nothing to for us to do for our clients.

In London, It's gone really surreal, yes there are some tourists going around, but numbers are way down.
The Underground during rush hour last night and again this morning when I travelled was so empty.

My football training/matches/junior training are all postponed and new protective measures have been brought
in for the homeless work I do.

The Pubs, cafes and restaurants around were I work if not empty had a number of customers you easily could count on one hand.
The little cafe that I go to every lunchtime is empty, when I told the woman behind the counter I was off to at least the end of the month.
She started crying, they're an independent and unlike chains can't so easily absorb loses, especially with the high rents round here.

The Premiere of Mulan that was scheduled to take place in Central London last night was cancelled.
The showing went ahead, but its public release has been postponed and guess what "The Mutants" release has been postponed.

For drink read fuck.

And
The Melbourne Comedy Festival has been cancelled
https://www.comedyfestival.com.au/2020/2020-statement

 

The guy tried to get you to sleep with him for a bog-roll?
That's horrible.

And enterprising.

Also, of all the things to grab the feel-good award of the day...Pornhub?

 

Boy, not even a pandemic stops them for wanting you eh Sophie

Ahh, what a time to be an American, when fucking Pornhub is more humane and prepared than my own government

 

why didnt anyone ask me i never said that i liked italy. Stupid pornhub.

 

I'm not surprised and heard it before, but it was akin to some sort of zombie movie.
If I hadn't of been in a queue, I'd of asked him where would he like his front teeth
when I knock them out for him.

I don't know if a VPN set to Italy would work?

Its good pr for the company, as is other newspapers dropping there pay walls
aimed at people in enforced isolation.

Got this comfort pic, but it got a bit lost in this morning's events at work.

So now I'm officially on sick leave (now sick but unemployed) that will be
paid for three weeks (and we were worried about Brexit) if we're not back by
then I will be unemployed.

I've got a feeling the office might remain closed, the big Boss is getting in
touch with the landlord for rent reduction while we're out of the office.
If they don't that may be that.

Went into my little daily cafe and brought some of the food they had left
over, I'm going to feast tonight lol

 

There's my Sophie

 

that is not fair and right Sophie.

 

Got this in a round robin:
“Do not go to a man’s home for a hookup right now!

You could get quarantined there and they don’t even have sheets.

They definitely won’t have toilet paper. Maybe one bag of hot pockets. A can of Cheeto puffs.

That’s all you’ll have. Is that what you want?”

 

Im a man i can say its true. Birthday on monday. Weird i dont feel the age i am.

 

Early Happy Birthday!!!

Comfort pic

I got offered some Bar work, but i don't think i can take them up on the offer?

 

Stomping thwm on their toes work wonders to in many cases.

 

I box and I've broken a guys nose before (you're right about the hand, the number of people that break their thumbs), but thanks!
Be very careful hitting anyone in the throat, if the punch is hard enough you could kill them.
If you're punching, glancing blow, not face on, but left or right, not upper that's messy.

Solar plexus will have them winded and on the floor.

The Toes is a good move, also punching their shoulder really hard (depends on whether they are left or right-handed).
Big time, that in most cases will have them on the floor.

Either way, as my Granny once told me "Hit them in the Crown Jewels".

and

Remember that flight I booked for my Boss and friends to NYC, they got an option to cancel/refund.

They took it.